1. On the topic on the power of the tongue: If God made the Heavens and the Earth and basically everything with mere words, and if we are made in God's image, then surely our words have the power to create too. Maybe not physical objects, but the power of the tongue can be used to create friendships, trust, faith or courage.

2. Can you imagine the kind of grace God gives us? If His words have the power to change all creation with the merest whispers, why are we exempt? If He tells rocks to burst out in song, they will. If He tells the sky to turn green and the clouds pink, they will, the moment it leaves His mouth. But He gives us the power to choose. He makes us an exception to His ultimate, unlimited rule. He gives us the power of choice, to choose between whether or not we want to obey what He says. Even more, He the power of free will means there are times where He speaks and we're too busy to listen. Get that? We can choose not to listen. The voice that all the universe finds irresistible, that they simply have to obey, we're given the grace to ignore. Think about that the next time He speaks.

3. Oftentimes the kind of issues we face can be grouped into two categories: the internal and the external. But within the internal, the self-contained, the ways in which it gets resolved can be further grouped into two ways. Sometimes, the issue is resolved first in your heart, then the change is shown through action. Sometimes, it's the other way around, and the very action in itself shows the way in which the heart has been changed. It's two different things. The first is a scenario where the change in action is involuntary, due to the change in heart. The second is a scenario where the change in heart is done in that course of action, in that change in actions. Of course, that's just my theory on things. Maybe in truth both are the same, where the change in action is the final phase of the change in heart (which actually corresponds with both possibilities)

4. I'm reminded that God loves to have me in His presence. Today, after altar call, I got to do my very favorite thing in service: just sit there in His presence. I'm serious, so very often I just want to sit down during altar call because standing feels too... formal? Sure, sometimes I'm meeting God my King and I find myself on my knees; sometimes I'm meeting God my Lord in that posture of worship; but sometimes I'm just discussing my life with God my best friend. And just sitting in His presence... it feels right that way. Today it was just God ministering not with words, but just with His presence. Just being so happy with God my Father. And when I said 'God, I have to go, I need to eat with my cell', I felt a pang of sadness. Truthfully, I don't know how much of that sadness came from me, and how much of that was His sadness that I had to leave. But I did know He was sad. I hate having to leave His presence :/ really really really. It sucks so bad. I felt the change the moment I stepped out of the chapel and it was like... sigh.. ah well.

5. can't wait for CAAAAMP. The main reason why I advise people to go for camp is because that is where you understand so much of the Ignyte culture. You'll understand what we do. Even better, you understand why we do what we do. Not to mention the life-changing experiences with God. Not kidding, life change. I remember PDa mentioning at SP empowerment that one of the amazing things about ignyte camp is how much of the publicity is driven by the members themselves. You just need to say 'youth camp' and people will start whoo-ing. Go if you can!

6. weekend in church is awesome. God is awesome.

(I've made a deal with myself to stop limiting what I put here. If it stays in my mind long enough, or, conversely, if it feels like the sort of thought that will fly away again if I don't pin it down, I shall blog it up)

The very essence of a God-filled life is to be seen and felt and infectious in it's very nature. When it fills you to overflowing it can't be helped. It gets out. And people notice (whether they like it or not). It's not something you control. It's a light. A city upon a hill. And within that God-filled-ness means coping when times are tough.

To be honest, I love being discontented. A good kind of discontented, where you're glad with what God has given you, but you want more. It makes you yearn more. Be more desperate. So I find it weird sometimes when people say that their bleakness and loneliness or their stuff is getting in the way of God. Okay, it's true, half the time it's stuff that you can't change or can't change simply in that moment. But there are times where all you need in that situation is that little bit of God.

You see, bleakness and desperation? Best time to go to God. Take that whole load of issues you're struggling with, place it at the altars, say 'this is too much for me God, You help me fix it', then you stay as He helps you through. It's the best time. I'm not kidding, it's the best time. Take that to God, and prepare for miracles.

SIMPLIFIED FORMULA:

BLEAKNESS + TROUBLES + PROBLEMS + MOUNTAINS + STRUGGLES + EVERYTHING ELSE THAT IS WRONG = PAIN + SUCKINESS

BLEAKNESS + TROUBLES + PROBLEMS + MOUNTAINS + STRUGGLES + EVERYTHING ELSE THAT IS WRONG + GOD = MIRACLES + JOY



ME < ENOUGH

GOD > ENOUGH



(am math nerd)



Spending the whole day in church is actually loads of fun :D

(taking a page out of miss pillowclutcher)
a list of things that make me happy

Small things like chocolate. And seaweed that doesn't flake everywhere. When my internet decides not to die halfway through msn conversations. God. Not having to sleep because my next day is free. Getting loads of sleep when my body crashes on me. Not being bugged by my parents to go sleep (even if it IS 5 in the morning). God. Being with the people in my life that make me smile. Late night conversations in half-conscious states. Having free incoming calls. God. The innumerable fun/crazy/generally retarded things 4.11 does. Watching the sunrise after a long night. Being there for people when they need me. God. When people get touched by God after I act in obedience. When this blog stirs someone to thought and grow just a little in their walk. Ice cream. God. The smell of rain. The still of the night. Warm showers in the morning after sleeping in a cold room. God. Ignyte ministry. Being on stage serving. That moment where I capture a stray thought. God. Reading a book I've read before and seeing things from a different perspective. Playing MAO. Finally completing that elusive achievement in any game. God. When God ambushes me with His Love or His Grace or just His amazing presence when I least expect it. Being able to wake up in the morning with a smile on my face. Having my past left in the past. God. When the first lines of a poem enter my head. Eating Lavender food court wanton noodles. Watching whose line is it anyway. God. Making a whole string of really bad jokes. Doing Sudoku. Brain puzzles that are solved with a flash of brilliance. God. Reading. The experience of meeting new people that are nice. Knowing someone means it when they acknowledge your friendship. God. Sharing. Laughing. Living. God.

A short post today
I'm very tired
poking my brain to squeeze out the funny

I love this song
and I think it befits communion weekend :)

Saviour - Hillsong



A Saviour on a hill dying for my shame
Could this be true?
Defies the world I see
Yet this is all my heart was longing for
To know You my Lord
To know You Lord

You deserve
You deserve
You deserve all the praise

The heavens wept for You
The earth cried out "Could He be the One?"
For You so loved the world
You gave Your only Son to say
I love you so
Oh how I love You so

Hallelujah to the King
Hallelujah we will sing forever

And all humanity
Aches to find this beautiful love You give
We come to You again
To offer up our lives
To worship You alone
To worship You alone



will come back with a better, longer post

Bitter-Sweet

Ah, my dear angry Lord,
Since thou dost love, yet strike;
Cast down, yet help afford;
Sure I will do the like.

I will complain, yet praise;
I will bewail, approve;
And all my sour-sweet days
I will lament and love.

-George Herbert

"The altars are a safe place"

I like that line.

Mostly because it's absolutely true.

I don't understand why some people feel they have to put on a mask in church
okay, I understand, but I don't condone it.
It's supposed to be the one place where things go right. Where you're close to God and the body of Christ. It's supposed to be the place where you can be who you are without condemnation.

And even worse is walls we build up.

I think the point when the altars become a life-changing place is when you let your guard down and let God in.
That's what so special at that place.
That's where we let loose, and praise God with wild abandon
That's where God does what He needs to because we let Him
Where we let go and let God.

And maybe that's what you need to learn
to be vulnerable.

Sure, you can be vulnerable at home.
In your time alone with God

But there's something special about the altars.
It's where God intends to meet His people.
I mean, if you read back to the days of the tabernacle, the altar was the place where offerings were placed and sacrifices made
it's where God met man, where Heaven touches Earth
It's a special, special place,
and God does recognize it's significance.



The thing about masks is that you're never going to be strong enough to keep them on all the time
or trying to live with it
it's like...
the hollow mask in bleach
(oh yes I just went there)
it doesn't matter how strong you are, you can't keep it up forever
eventually it's going to crack or fall away
especially in those moments of high tension or high pressure
you're going to tire

the choice given to you is when and where and with who
that you're gonna take that mask off
before it falls off for you.



take it off in His presence
and slowly you'll find you don't need it anymore.

You're strong when I am weak
brave when I am not
God You are my God
-Lifter of My Head, Mia Fieldes

(am rambling, am tired. nap time please.)

I know, I know, I've put this song up here twice already
it's not that it's a mindblowing song on the technical side
in fact, it's pretty repetitive, but I love it
I love the heart of it
This is one of the songs I sing when I'm pushing and pressing in
And just really saying that I refuse to be denied my audience with my King
declaring that I know who my God is
I know who I am in Him
I know His love
and I know that nothing has the right to get between Him and me
it's just a tremendous pushing and pushing and pushing for that breakthrough.
It's something familiar, a feeling I'm used to.



I'm rejoicing alot that my exams are over
heh, but at the same time
complaining :p
because now there's no excuse for God to give me opportunities
so I complain that He isn't giving me enough
then He shows me the ones He's already given that I'm not focusing on
then I go something like "oh riiiiight"

There's alot of looking to the future
and I'm trying to concentrate on my present.
maybe I should just look to God :)



Now's the time to take leaps of faith
to jump and trust that He'll catch you
even though it's so easy now to take time for yourself
I get it, you've been concentrating on your studies, now it's 'me' time
time to do what you want, to relax a little
I get it
but maybe your time is the most precious commodity you have
yea, your life is precious, and it's expressed in units of time
and every moment you take for yourself
is a moment you can't give to God.

take some time to recharge your batteries
but don't waste these last few weeks in school!
make it count people.

I have a tendency not to blog much in my own voice during times of stress cause those are the moments where I don't trust myself to say what I should.

Anyway, the thought that came to me today in the midst of a very fun FUEL on apologetics (root word apologia, means 'in the defence of', in this context Christian faith. I actually enjoy apologetics because I love a) arguing and b) christianity (I blame mugging for the fact of suddenly using stuff like a) and b). Also, interesting use of brackets within brackets (which actually reminds me of The Only American From Our Village, by Arun Joshi. Oh wait, larts paper over) within brackets) and sixteen years of being a second-generation christian with a mind that thinks too darn much and that is what happens), when P. Andy raised the topic of moral dilemmas, I realised something. Isn't the beauty of moral dilemmas that they illustrate so wonderfully the human capacity for compassion. (also, if you could follow the train of thought above, kudos to you)

I mean think about it. The moral dilemma that he raised was one of those that I remember from POD sessions (acib ftw) as well as something I've wondered about in primary school before. Is it morally wrong for a man to steal medicine for his dying child? What if he's tried every possible legal method to get that money, but all turn him down? Is it still wrong for him to steal?

And I'm not going to pronounce a verdict on whether or not it is, but take a step back and think about it. The fact that your first instinct is to admit that stealing in itself is a morally wrong action, yet the circumstances of why he did that would cause you to reconsider, thus the dilemma. If we were but cold, heartless, fully judging without love or compassion, then regardless of circumstance we would condemn. Yet because each and everyone of us possess that piece of His heart, we reconsider. The very act of reconsidering itself illustrates that we can feel. And I think that's pretty beautiful (:

4 down, 10 to go

You are bigger, stronger, and more than enough for my mountains :)